There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
your like the ambassador to my penis.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
