Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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