Is it normal to miss your booty call?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize