Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
