Duck Duck Cougar?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
