Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize