how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i think i have two assholes
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
