We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
