Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just forgot I was standing up.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
