So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
