sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
