this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
