He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize