I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
