Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
