i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
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