you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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