Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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