Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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