I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Randomize
