chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
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