So drunk its hurt
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize
