WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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