just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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