I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize