Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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