How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
