Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize