i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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