You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
