what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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