drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
