Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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