Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
