The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize