Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
