You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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