Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize