Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
