But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
