In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i believe in u and ur pee
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
