oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
