i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize