It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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