i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize