you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize