she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
