5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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