I wanna bring you to show and tell
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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