He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
